09
Jun
10

beep beep?

I have two pieces of evidence now which should clearly provide credibility to my argument. What is this about, you may ask?

This argument is one that has been widely debated (unfairly I might add), mainly due to my ‘disadvantage’ of having some Asian genes. Stereotype here baby!

I would like to claim (with some substantial reports now) that I am actually a good driver.

(Why are you laughing?)

My first testament came via this article. It basically states that, due to some astrological greatness, Capricorns happen to be good drivers. I am a Capricorn (and apparently also motivated and determined). Success. :D It also says that people who happen to be under the sign of the Crab, are the worst drivers and likely to be in the most car accidents.

My second came in the form of a letter from Vicroads, advising me that I was soon to be off my P Plates, and they are thus going to reward me with a discounted upgrading-of-licence fee.

Hooray! (However, $35 does not appear to be that discounted, eh?)

I have long been asserting my good-driverness to doubters, but look, Vicroads says I am good, so take that.

The other day however, I was driving, two lanes merged into one and this guy totally cut me off. I honked my horn. Well at least I thought I did. I pushed the middle of my steering wheel with enough force that should have resulted in a noise that alerted the other driver to his obvious mistake, and made him rather apologetic towards my circumstances.

He didn’t even turn around. No acknowledgement. No nothing.

Is my horn broken?! I severely hope not!

In fact, I was rather worried to the point that I re-tested my horn-honking abilities in the privacy of my garage.

It works. However, I am concerned about the audibility of it.

(I am going to completely ignore the fact that my music was up rather loud to the point that my side mirrors were vibrating. That clearly has nothing to do with my horn’s muteness)

If my car horn were a person who was trying to cut or weave its way around other people, it would be saying ‘please sir, (Oliver style), may you shuffle over a little because I may have to manoeuvre my way over here/you are performing a driving move which is not to my liking, surely you are wrong, right?’.

Definitely not a powerful, pushy or shoving ‘I AM HERE! I AM GOING THERE! MOVE OVER!’. Even a bold, assertive ‘Excuse me!’ would be better than what I have.

Ok, to be completely honest, I drive a Volkswagen Golf.  It’s a small car which I can easily reverse parallel in one move (despite the fact one of my driving instructors back in the day said you were meant to reverse parallel in two moves – oops), and it is a rather cute car. Its nicknamed Cleo btw (long story, don’t ask).

I don’t know why I expect a small car to have a big horn. Clearly, we don’t need to be compensating for anything. I’m not a big horn user anyway (especially because I am motivated and determined to avoid unnecessary risk).

I guess other people using their horns may be seen as rude, and I admit, I was overly cautious when I first started out driving mainly because I was worried I was actually the one who was doing some inaccurate driving manoeuvre. (As if, right? Hah)

Though, with the horn I’ve got, it’s not like anyone will be taking any notice of what they’re doing wrong anyway.

Please sir, acknowledge the bad driving practises to which you are partaking in. Please? Beep beep!

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